Places to Doss?

Stylish Worthing Hotel

Why pay for accommodation in one of Brighton and Hove's second-rate hotels? Instead, just bring a tent, matress, duvet or sleeping bag (or steal one from one of the many other uninvited visitors) and bed down for the night wherever takes your fancy. There are plenty of covered doorways just waiting to be adorned with sheets of cardboard and mouldy blankets. Don't worry if the doorway leads to someone's home or business, they will be more than happy to kick you out of the way in the morning when they need to get in or out.

Unlike in well-kempt, higher-class towns such as Worthing, in Brighton and Hove, you can rest safely in your hovel, knowing that you won't be moved on by the ineffectual Sussex police force, or the liberal yet lily-livered local Labour council, so stay as long as you like. Why not enhance your visit by begging, as the welcoming, wet behind the ears citizens of the city love never tire of a good sponger.

There are public toilets all along the sea-front, and with grotty views over the litter-encrusted beach, so flock to Brighton and Hove like a bunch of mangy seagulls, because sleeping on the streets is never rough, just the sea.